10 Things They Don’t Teach You in Business School
Our guest blogger, Larry Chiang, is an instructive humorist. If you liked “9 VC’s You’re Gonna Want To Avoid“, you’ll like this submission on things that business school will never teach you.
 Yes, Uncle Larry neglects his nephew and spoils the nieceBIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Before he’s done, business school will be boiled down into a power point presentation.
By Larry Chiang
-1- How to bend ears and get phone numbers.
People ask me how I get access into the halls of power (Hollywood, DC, Silicon Valley) even though I’m obviously of low IQ. I use my mentor’s technique called M.P.A.F., Multiple Party Agenda Fulfillment. It helps me add value by guessing at their agenda and filling it.
I hypothesize agendas by layering in open ended questions, reading every scrap they have ever written and networking with their associates in an open, transparent fashion. I get meetings with charm, but I get commitment using MPAF.
MPAF has you list out agendas and then you venn diagram together the agendas that overlap. The parties that have overlap you bring together and communicate (and confirm) the new alliance potential.
-2- Kissing alpha butt augments your rolodex. Alphas are always getting nibbled on by ‘betas’ and ‘gammas’. What I mean here by ‘alpha’ is top dog, ‘beta’ is second tier and gamma is a little lower down the totem pole.
Alphas (CEOs, Senators, and Deans) need to be charmed using a five step process
(a) acknowledge their tier one status and refer to book(s), position papers or blog posts they’ve written. This flatters even the most stand-off-ish.
(b) no name dropping to build your own brand
(c) clearly identify your focus and how you will add value. In the short term, you can add value by getting them a refreshment, wrangling them and making introductions to other fans (fetching a whatever-they-need helps too).
Long term, I let them know I blog and am writing a book that I’d like to talk to them about.
(d) allow your time of interaction to have a clear end by saying, “one more thing before I let you go”
(e) close by getting their cell phone number.
Accessing power by helping them first (while kissing butt) is a great manuver they don’t teach at b-school .
-3- Single tasking is the new multi-tasking. People who multi-task tend to do lower quality work. For example, people who read a webpage while multitasking have a rate of comprehension at a fraction of singular focus.
-4- Leverage double entendre. It is an art to say one thing well. It is humorously
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genius to say something and have it subtly hint at something fun while educating. For example, duck9 stands for deep underground credit knowledge. The acronym is cute but has the double entendre meaning of avoiding 9s on your credit report. Triple entendre would be some motif about the logo but I’m working on that third layer 
-5- Use a 41 cent stamp to beat out the HBS/GSB alums. Leverage snail mail to rise over the clutter of email. Regular mail can be your stealth method of communication. In my experience, it is something that separates me from other more qualified candidates.
We’ve all met people who send email ‘thank-you’s. Those are ok but are often over looked and very quickly deleted. As follow-ups to meetings, emails are ok. As reciprocity for something more, I like sending something more significant… like ‘thank-you’ flowers for hosting an event.
My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. He recommends a ‘thank-you’ card sent via snail mail. I think a box of 25 thank you cards costs about $7 at the Office Depot. I’m not as good at calculating the ROI on the seven bucks as the U of Chicago GSB grad, but I do make more money.
-6- Get towed. If you’re not getting towed twice per year, you are NOT parking aggressively enough. I don’t know how this applies to b-school, but I think its about bending policies and procedures to your advantage.
-7- Tip bribe comp and tip like a community college valet parker. I said ‘tip’ twice because I like it most. Tipping is a secret lubricant that helps you get things done. When I “work a conference”, I tip really well right away. Magically I get upgraded to a big-boy suite. Coincidentally, I get my car a little faster and I sometimes even get greeted by name at breakfast.
-8- Be sweet and sour. Question, what makes Chinese food taste oh-so-good?! Sweet and sour sauce. Sweet = tipping, sour = micro-management. For example, after the bellhop grabs your bag, you tip two Abe Lincolns and utter, “Here buddy, two nickels for you… And don’t screw this up. I need my stuff up to my room ASAP”.
Having both sweet and sour makes you a better manager. Sour mixed in with sweet is tolerable and makes you a more flavored and memorable communicator.
-9- Exit strategy for your B-school girlfriend. B-school professors coach starting a company with an “exit strategy” in mind. Well, I am here, to say that relationships in b-school need to have an exit strategy too. A clean exit means a clear path out that will keep you both on at least speaking terms or better. Remember, never enter a relationship that you can’t leave a half a dozen ways.
Number 10 I will leave up to y’all. Please leave your “tip you didn’t learn in b-school” in the comments. Best tip (as voted on by ME) will get a fleece jacket. Winner will be picked after Thanksgiving break or first dozen comments, whichever comes later.
Larry Chiang is the founder of duck9, which educates college student on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He is a frequent contributor to GigaOm’s Found|Read. His earlier posts include: How to Work The Room; 8 Tips On How to Get Mentored ; and 9 VCs You’re Gonna Want To Avoid. You can read more equally funny, founder-focused-lessons on Larry’s Amazon blog.
How to Work a Cocktail Party
Larry Chiang is an instructive humorist. If you liked “10 Things They Don’t Teach You at Business School “, you’ll like this submission on ‘how to work a cocktail party’.
Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Before he’s done, your vig (aka debt) from business school will be signed, sealed and paid off.
By Larry Chiang
Between Thanksgiving and Christmas, there are about a dozen holiday cocktail parties. How we “work” these parties affects our careers much more than we care to admit. Some people are naturally at-ease socializing. I’ve observed how these people work a party and summarized ten years of party-going into 10 fundamental networking tips to help you ace the cocktail circuit.
-1- Define a Small Party Goal.
This IS a work function, so having goals for a party is appropriate. For example, your goal could be to say hi to 10+ people before you say hi to one Rob
Hof of Business Week. If you are someone’s guest or their “Plus One”, your goal could be 90 minutes of pretending to be interested in people you may never see (and accidentally learning something in the process). Be like Baxter (my shih tzu) and tilt your head and SELL the fact you are listening intently.
-2- Add Value to the Host.
Susan Roane wrote the book, How to Work a Room and she adds value by managing the party’s host. I manage the host by asking if they need help, making sure they get to meet people and I definitely do not text or call the host before the party “to see how its going”. These calls tend to stress the host out because they have their hands full starting the party.
My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
2b) Do Not Try to “Out-Alpha” the Host.
No one-upping in any way shape or form. The best questions for the host are upbeat, light and fluffy which require a simple answer. For example, “Aren’t you happy Dave McClure is here?”, “Don’t you look stunning?”, “Congratulation on being a SXSW speaker” or my fave, “Aren’t you a genius for ordering THESE?”
Keep the compliments simple then let the host mingle.
2c) Add Value Before the Party by RSVPing the Right Way.
The best RSVP is enthusiastic, public, promotional and accurate. Similarly, I added value by crashing a party with a VIP guest. At TechCrunch50, I brought my Grammy winning friend Chamillionaire. He was a big hit in the tech community and the hosts remembered me for it.
2d) Add Value by Being More of a Host and Less of a Guest.
Susan Roane talks about how there are two types of people at a party; hosts and guests. People like hosts more because they make introductions, and make people more comfortable. Guests tend to need attention and maintenance.
-3- ‘Sell’ New Ideas at the Party.
Start with your — or your company’s — core competence. Since Duck9 educates college students about FICO scores and debt minimization, I springboard from the “what-do-you-do-for-work” question with common myths about FICO scores.
This makes me seem substantive and clearly brands me. I’m the “Duck Dude”, with the magnet for a business card who educates college students about their FICO scores.
-4- Attempt to be ONE Person’s Favorite Person.
A big party faux pas is “shoulder surfing”. “Shoulder Surfing” is when you are talking to one person while looking over their shoulder for something better to talk to. I attempt to leave a party with one person saying, “OMG, I hung out with Larry Chiang and he was like a vacation – I love that guy.”
-5- Make Fundamentally Correct Introductions.
Remembering names is 95+% of it. The method of properly making an introduction is outlined in Letitia Baldridge’s book, Executive Manners. In short, you use the person’s name PLUS short summary of who they are. Ideally you introduce junior people to senior, higher ranking (Alphas).
-6- KISS BUTT.
Kiss Beta or Gamma ass in addition to brown-nosing the Alphas. Alpha, Beta, Gamma (and Delta) refer to the pecking order of partygoers. If you meet an Alpha with their entourage of betas and gammas, don’t forget to kiss everyone’s butt because the entourage influences the pack leader’s opinion of you.
-7- Stay Off Your Phone.
If this is the FIRST cocktail mixer you’ve ever been to, PRESS ONE NOW.
-8- Set Aside Your Need to Hook-Up.
It always amazes me how people gravitate to
hot women even at a tech event. My rule of thumb is “no talking to hot women before 11:30pm” (yes, I stole that from Chicago-native Jeremy Piven of Entourage).
I was at a SuperBowl party in Phoenix and it was jam-packed with hot women. All the athletes would absolutely ignore them and palm-press the agents, press, party-producers and the like. Come 11:30 or 11:45pm, people would start coupling off like a mad-dash for musical chairs. Temporarily setting aside your need to hook-up helps you network better.
If you are a woman, you need the opposite strategy. The best tip is “separate, extend and escape”. For example, at a work cocktail party, you want to mix, mingle and not be monopolized and “hot-boxed” (when a person squares you off and is well into your personal space you are getting hotboxed).
(1) First you forecast the separation: ” I think I have to meet my co-worker at the door / bar / table”
(2) Then you extend, “it was nice saying ‘hi’. I’ll come back later”
(3) Finish by turning and walking and you will have escaped.
-9- Master Transitional Phrases.
If you are working the entire cocktail party, you had better ease the start and stop of conversations.
When leaving a group, say, “I’m heading to the bar/bathroom/appetizer tray. Anyone need anything?!”
If you’re meeting a person, while with another person say, “I’m wrangling (aka hosting) my plus one who is late. Can I meet you later?”
If you’re sexually attracted to the person, say “goodness I wanna talk to you all night but my party mentor, Larry Chiang, says I should just get your number so I can keep working the cocktail party”.
The most important transitional phrase is to the host before you leave. Always, always, always: thank the host before you leave.
-10- Follow UP.
Take the business cards you collect and organize them. I put cards into a clear holder within a three ring binder. I also label who I need to follow-up with and how.
** Bonus Party Tip **
What is best thing after a cocktail party? The After-Party that YOU are hosting! It does not have to be at a fancy location. Heck it can even be LaBamba in Lincoln Park, Stanley’s, Gamekeepers or Chinese food if you are in San Francisco. If you have “alpha game”, have it at the Four Seasons and get Duck9 to sponsor it.
Hey next time you’re at a mixer, show someone this post about ‘working a party’ on your iPhone and email them the link. Yes it is a sneaky way of getting THEIR contact info. Or call me and I’ll be your party crashing buddy. 650-283-8008
CONTEST: Please leave your “HOW TO WORK A COCKTAIL PARTY” tip in the comments. Best tip (as voted on by ME) will get a fleece jacket. Winner will be picked after Thanksgiving break or first ten comments, whichever comes later.
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Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Larry Chiang is the founder of duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He will be a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School. His earlier posts at GigaOm include: How to Work The Room; 8 Tips On How to Get Mentored ; and 9 VCs You’re Gonna Want To Avoid. You can read more equally funny, founder-focused-lessons on Larry’s Amazon blog.
My 10 Best B-Schools and How They Can Help You Too
Larry Chiang is an instructive humorist. If you liked “10 Things They Don’t Teach You at Business School ” and ”How to Work a Cocktail Party“, you’ll like his newest submission: “My 10 Best B-Schools and How They Can Help You Too”.
Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Before he’s done, you’ll have built up your resume to the point that business schools will be recruiting you like a college basketball phenom.
By Larry Chiang
Have you seen the Business Week top B-School rankings?!
I do not qualify for any of them thanks to my tumultuous engineering undergrad career and that fact got me hecka mad. My pain is your gain.
Schools for learning about business enthrall me and capture my imagination. In the same way Jesus saw 12 rocks to sit on as a church, I see the “school for business” EVERYWHERE.
Here are my 10 best B-Schools and hopefully they will help you out-earn, out-flank and leap-frog hundreds of tier one MBAs who are neck deep in school loans.
-1- Working for your Alpha Uncle. Working for your alpha father (or worse father-in-law) is near impossible. Working for your dad’s brother is near ideal. He loves you because he is blood and mentors you — but if and WHEN you start making dumb mistakes, he has enough separation to not take your temporary stupidity as a reflection of his genetic make-up.
-2- PaCC Law School. Here PaCC stands for Palo Alto Community College aka Stanford University Law School (SLS). Laws govern the rules of business so mastering the ground rules help you play the game.
SLS has outreach programs and open source learning agendas meaning you can learn what they learn if you buy the books and teach yourself. If you want to uncover even more, Hoover Institute hosts great guest speakers on cutting edge legal topics and has an email list open to the public.
-3- Small Claims Court. After learning laws, reading about torts and claims and studying contract law, it’s time to practice. I recommend small claims court where you file a case, read about procedures, prepare exhibits and present before a live judge. After my first win against an uninsured motorist, I even learned to collect on a claim by encumbering a driver’s license.
Getting back to legal basics is helpful. Similarly, the Cato Institute passes out Constitutions to congressman.
-4- Prison. Entering an environment with clear and ever changing pecking order is tough to swallow. My biggest lesson from prison / jail: Learn how to take it temporarily in the rear before exacting your revenge.
Knee-jerk revenge only lands you in solitary for a week while your enemy preps, plans and gathers resources. Setting aside your need for short-term revenge gratification is a lesson from my fave book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Stanford Business School“.
-5- The Univesity Club bar after 11pm on a Tuesday. I learn here when alpha males are dee-runk and confessional. Show you can keep a secret and you get a time extension to stay in this secret society. Prove you can keep a secret under the duress of interogation and you will be granted life-long membership.
-4- The Reading Room. I read at the Borders next to my dorm room in Palo Alto, California all-the-time.
My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
I also read good stuff on the Internet (i.e. My blog has my favorite sources). And when I go to conferences, I effen TAKE NOTES on how I’m gonna apply what was just said.
Art Moreno, founder of Universal Outdoor and owner of the Anaheim Angels, is one of the best note-takers ever. I wanna be a billionaire just like him.
-5- The Sales Floor of the Car Dealership. There is something gritty and granular about executing one of the largest transactions in a person’s life: buying a car. Village Pontiac in Naperville IL was one of my best learning experiences ever and I see it as pivotal in my current ability to outflank smarter VCs and CEOs with tier one MBAs. It taught me how to move product, prospect sales leads, sell on the phone, boil down complicated car loans and manage a team of sharks from stealing MY commission.
-6- The Scottsdale Bible Church Men’s Retreat. Scottsdale AZ has the best church ever and I crashed their annual Men’s Retreat. I learned that if you’re heart is not right, you’re not gonna stay a millionaire.
I also listened to the mistakes men twice my age made and I (as sure as mentor rose from the dead for about 100 days and was witnessed by about 500-600 people) WILL NOT MAKE THOSE SAME MISTAKES.
I call this leveraging OPE: Other People’s Experience.
-7- The blogger pit at TC50. TechCrunch50 had a blogger pit which was the first four rows.
I learned about how bloggers compose stories, networked with each other, shared sources and built comraderie.
-8- Mistakes-ville. This mistakes I have made are all in my personal love life. I avoid work mistakes by learning from OPE (point #6).
-9- Mentors. Mentors are great only if you listen. I write about how to attract a good mentor. My mentor lineage reads like Top 10 list of billionaires who are, street-smart, centered and philanthropic.
Read about how I woo them at
http://gigaom.com/2007/09/04/8-tips-on-how-to-get-mentored/
-10- The Movie Theatre.
Movies mirror life’s lessons and here are some great movies that teach about business.
Ironman. Peter Stark is the movie’s CEO and I summarized ”10 Things Ironman Teaches about Entrepreneurship“.
Top Gun. Maverick gets mentored by “Viper”, ‘Goose’ and “Charlie”. These are superstar mentor, junior mentor and cohort mentor (respectively) and all in my Chapter 4.
Color of Money. Paul Newman educates Tom Cruise about how to work a pool hall.
Wall Street. Gordon Gecko educates Bud Fox on how to work Wall Street.
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Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Larry Chiang is the founder of Duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He will be a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School”. His earlier posts at GigaOm include similar topics of: How to Work The Room; 8 Tips On How to Get Mentored ; and 9 VCs You’re Gonna Want To Avoid. You can read more equally funny, founder-focused-lessons on Larry’s Amazon blog.
Raise Your FICO While You’re an MBA Student
Larry Chiang writes about business school. If you liked “10 Things They Don’t Teach You at Business School ” and ”How to Work a Cocktail Party“, and “My 10 Best B-Schools and How They Can Help You Too“, then have a look at his latest topic: Raising Your FICO While You’re in an MBA Program.
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Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO |
Before he’s done, your FICO credit score will jump even while you take on thirty grand more in scholarly debt.
By Larry Chiang
Congrats on getting into your MBA program.
If you are one of the lucky few on company scholarship, count yourself fortunate. If you’re financing it yourself, lets boost your future school loan financing alternatives by raising your FICO score.
Yes, my soon-to-be captain of industry, you CAN manipulate, hack and alter your FICO credit score for the better. I am your mentor for “deep underground credit knowledge” and am a master of all things insightful and mundane with regards to credit score. Google me… I’m sort of a big deal :-]
Thank me by sending text message love to 650-283-8008. Call it and be freaked out when I answer it. Or be overly courteous and email chiang9@duck9.com, but include my cell to bust through my spam filter.
Here are 9 tips to raise FICO.
-1- Urban Myths Sink Ships.
The credit industry wants you dumb, stupid and in the dark. For example, the industry quotes the average FICO score to be 678 or even as high as 700+. The real average credit score is 585.
-2- Get a FICO Mentor.
To the benefit of my twelve readers this week, you can use my cell number or Facebook Austin TX network page and I will mentor you. Who am I? A guy who has credit educated peeps and is now writing a tell-all book.
http://www.WhatTheyDontTeachYouAtStanfordBusinessSchool.com
-3- Snail Mail is Your BFF.
Snail mail is mail sent with a 41c stamp. BFF is ‘best friend forever’.
I have made millions steering people towards a higher FICO score. The absolute biggest secret is that postage paid, old school stamps preserve your credit rights. Remember, FCBA stands for “Fair Credit Billing Act” — not the Fair Credit Biatching Act. Yes, 800 number systems were set-up to short-circuit your rights because voicing a complaint does not document your problem in the eyes of the law (FCBA and FCRA –”Fair Credit Reporting Act”).
-4- Know Your Derogatories.
Dispute borderline negatives after running your credit report. A huge urban myth is that getting a credit report hurts your credit score… it does NOT. I repeat, getting your own credit report does not hurt your credit.
My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
Checking your own credit does not hurt your credit because it is a “consumer inquiry”. There are three types of inquiries; consumer, advertiser and credit. Credit inquiries are the only ones that hurt your credit. Print and mail the from HERE http://www.duck9.com/free-credit-report-form.htm
-5- Visualize Growth.
Track your FICO progress on a thermometer. Use one like the ‘Jump-rope-a-thon’ fundraising thermometer that you used in grade school.
-6- Get a Fake Mini Loan.
Make small purchases on a Visa/MC account and pay off in full. This is your fake mini loan: owing $20 to American Express, Discover or Capital One Visa. Credit bureaus make no distinctions between $15.50 paid on-time versus $15,500 paid on time. Ignore leveraging this TIP at your own peril. Procrastinate taking action on this TRUTH and risk wallowing in the lower percentiles.
ACTION: Take two seconds and fill this out and mail it in. http://www.duck9.com/free-credit-report-form.htm
-7- Give Good Google.
Get text message reminders you send yourself via google calendar. On the11th and 21st of every month, I login to EVERY ACCOUNT to make sure all are up-to-date.
I also list out every debt obligation on a manilla folder. For built in redundency, I also get paper bills (to my new dorm address).
-8- Bastard Bills Are Killer.
Find the bastard bill(s) and deal with it/them. An example of a bastard bill is a parking ticket from a city you visited. It grows from a $20 violation to some amount over $100 (almost always). Settle this out by negotiating directly with the original biller (and not the collection agency that bought the debt).
For example, City Of Beverly Hills cited you for a $20 ticket. You ignored it and now the bill is in collections for 5x the original amount. Paying the collector is a mistake. Dealing with the collector and listening to their threats and misinformation is a big, big mistake.
-8b- Orphan bills suck too.
Orphans develop when three people share a utility bill, but no one pays the last bill and YOUR name is on the bill. If your name is on the bill, your credit report will get hit.
SOLUTION: Pay bastards and orphans with a physical check. Why?! Checks are legal documents that tip to scale in your favor. Here is how: In the ‘memo section’ of the check, clearly label the bill to be paid and reference number, “parking ticket 6707-9805 + penalties PAID IN FULL”
Once the check is cashed, you now have the matter cleared if you keep a digital picture or photocopy to present to the credit bureaus.
-9- Document It All In Writing.
Complaining in written form preserves your rights. Emailing or calling does not. See my diatribe on FCBA — “Fair Credit Billing Act”. Complain in triplicate to get RESULTS: write in and cc Complaints.com and CreditCard.org.
-BONUS FICO CREDIT TIP- Pay It Forward.
Cut and paste this blog article to your Facebook in a note. Tell other people about what you learned here. This POST IS NOT copywritten (including this Business Week piece) so cut and paste to pass this advice forward 
If you need written authorization, email me larryChiang@duck9.com. Please cite this blogpost and link back.
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Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Larry Chiang is the founder of Duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He will be a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School“. His earlier posts on his last blogging assignment at GigaOm included: How to Work The Room; 8 Tips On How to Get Mentored ; and 9 VCs You’re Gonna Want To Avoid. You can read more equally funny, founder-focused-lessons on Larry’s Amazon blog.
Working a Twitter Party, Take 2
Larry Chiang offers a window into how business works. If you liked “10 Things They Don’t Teach You at Business School “, “Raise Your FICO While You’re An MBA Student“, and ”How to Work a Cocktail Party“, you’ll like his newest submission: “Working a Twitter Party, Take 2″.
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Larry’s book releases 09-09-09 |
Before he’s done, you’ll have a cell phone packed with contacts you can text message for superstar advice without having $30k/year in tuition debt.
By Larry Chiang
Twitter is something I do really, really well.
The new website setting the world afire answers the question, “What are you doing?”. The appeal is the simplicity: you do it in under 140 characters. Katheryn Boehret talks about “How Birds of a Feather Twitter Together“. My town loves, loves, loves Twitter. Yes, I live in Northern California.
Twitter is too new to be taught in business school but understanding and leveraging micro-blogging is important NOW. The Twitter Party is virtual and real. Here is over a year of my Twitter knowledge boiled down into my patented Top Ten Tips format.
(1) Build Your Brand.
Brian Solis writes about PR 2.0 where traditional media is getting outflanked by social media. Build your brand by picking a Twitter focus and sticking to a theme. Me?! I am the FICO credit dude that blogs about entrepreneurship and “What They Don’t Teach at Business School”.
(2) Amplify and Publicize.
Cut and paste material you are a fan of by “at-ing” people.
For example, I’ll be your BFF if you tweeted (i.e. posted a Twitter message), “@larryChiang, loved your article on Business Week about Twitter http://tinyurl.com/twitter20“
(3) Kiss Professor Butt.
Amplify and publicize your reach school’s professors to angle in for the inside track. It might possibly help you get into a better business school, but I would not know first hand about b-school admission because I am zero for three.
(4) Get Behind a Parade.
Summize.com will list out the top ten phrases. They have a hash tag (“#”) before them sometimes. #bwe08 was for BlogWorld Expo, #ventureSummit08 was for the VC Conference in Half Moon Bay, and #larryChiang sounds like a girls gone wild party (get it, ‘pound Larry Chiang’).
Anyway, starting parades are hard but identifying trends and getting behind momentum is easy, fun and slightly diabolical.
(5) Crazy Ivan Works for Me.
Aboard a submarine, a “Crazy Ivan” is where the sub captain comes to a full stop to check to see if anyone is following them in the baffles. Baffles are water turbulence caused by the propeller. Water turbulences renders sonar to be useless so sub captains crazy ivan to see what is in their wake.
Twitter’s equivalent is to check for people who follow you and possibly follow them back. I watch my ratio of “Friends” to “Followers” like a hawk because I wanna keep 1:1 or better.
(6) Run a Twitter Contest.
I love contests to generate interest for the topic I am trying to educate people on. For money, I credit educate people and bribe them with pizza and contests where everyone wins something. On Twitter, I reward those who follow and read my tweets with easy to win contests.
For example, I was at TechCrunch50 and tweeted, “First person to tweet one of my GigaOm blog posts (about Twitter Party) gets a Nordstrom’s gift card”. @puhala won it.
(7) Import the Real World Into Twitter.
Twitter Parties are starting to pop up in the real world. These tweetups used to be nerdy computer folk but now are beginning to be mainstream. I have met great friends such as @jowyang, @ec and @flackette.
Practice normal Twitter etiquette by following those who follow you. I use my PDA on the spot. For example, I was at Rick Calvert’s BlogWorldExpo where the majority of the conference twittered and I input Twitter handles directly into my Sidekick. When I was doing my post conference write-up, I could easily list out my favorite Twitter peeps.
Recently, these twitter folks made great impressions on me: @michaelCummings @lmclean @cloud8 @whitneyM @mucheazy @appley @lmclean @prRobin @cynk and @jjToothman
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My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
(8) Get Mentored and Find Mentors.
I hone in on a handful of topics I search via Summize.com. I am interested in FICO, credit scores and “SF + Parties”. Other people have found me when I tweet about entrepreneurship. Summize.com also has an iPhone application that pulls your searches together.
People who share interests can get mentored by pure strangers connected only by similar interests via Twitter.
(9) Fortune Cookie Flavor.
I have an unfair Twitter advantage because I love fortune cookie wisdom (because I am Chinese). Adding to my momentum is I read and regurgitate a lot (see Mark McCormack’s book). This translates into good tweets. If you want good tweets, make them feel fortune cookie-worthy.
Check me out on Twitter… I am kind of a big deal
P.S. I took fortune cookie flavored text messages one step further: I started a company that sends people text messages to raise their FICO.
(10) Avoid Twitter Pitfalls.
(a) Don’t add 100 people before you reach 100 tweets.
Starting slow is OK. Unfollowing those that don’t follow you back within a week is ok too.
(b) Don’t use a weird name people won’t remember
I use LarryChiang because if someone wants to stalk/kill me, they’d spend a dollar to run my credit report which lists EVERYTHING.
(c) Don’t tweet about the overly mundane but try to share something real and confessional.
Good luck out there and text me during my office hours: 11:11am/pm give or take 15 minutes. This article is at http://tinyurl.com/twitter20 so tweet it!!! Thx @tylerWillis. I am also on Facebook in the Austin TX network… why Texas?! It is because I started ‘Austin Secret Society of Entrepreneurs’ (#asse9). If you see a typo or grammatical error, email me with your cell in the subject line! larry@larrychiang.com If you host a tweetUp like #svTweetUp, post it in the comments BELOW.
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Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Larry Chiang is the founder of Duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He is a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School“. For fun, he crashes dorm cafeterias, eats at sorority houses and plays basketball on college campuses across the USA.
Increase Your Credit Score After Losing Your Job
Larry Chiang offers a window into how business really works. If you liked “10 Things They Don’t Teach You at Business School “, “Raise Your FICO While You’re An MBA Student“, “How to Work a Cocktail Party“, and “Working a Twitter Party, Take 2“, you’ll like his newest submission: “Increase Your Credit Score After Losing Your Job”.
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90 Day Delinquencies’ Spike |
Before he’s done, you’ll have an arsenal of business tactics strait from the street.
By Larry Chiang
Keeping a high FICO is possible after getting laid off.
Job loss and employment volatility top the reasons Americans cite for losing a 100+ points on their FICO. After Tribune Company declared bankruptcy, the business climate is expected to get worse. A clear example is on the graph, ‘Loans in Limbo’ where 90 day delinquencies spiked according to this week’s American Banker.
FICO is the super secret algorithm the credit industry uses to determine how risky you are to lend money to. It controls your personal cost of capital. There is nothing more important than keeping your FICO from falling when you lose your job (next to finding another job).
Here is a summary of how to keep your FICO high after you lose your job.
-1- Damage Control.
Compartmentalization help submarines not sink when they take on water. Remember, ships only sink when enough compartments get flooded. My favorite default is a 2nd mortgage.
Some people rob Peter to pay Paul. If you’ve ever taken a loan to pay a loan, then you KNOW what I’m talking about. Don’t borrow to pay. Also, never trade a securitized debt (first or second mortgage) for a credit card debt.
-2- Holidaze Control.
Don’t think a $150 pair of jeans won’t hurt your existing $9k in credit card debt. Debt momentum is an all-too-human mistake during Christmas.
-3- No Hail Mary’s.
A Hail Mary is a miraculous debt solution that up and bites you on the butt. It could be in the form of a radio ad or email promising “overnight debt relief”. No one on the radio is going to help you with your credit card debt by charging you $2k upfront.
The answer to the Hail Mary is reading the “Ultimate Credit Handbook” by Gerri Detweiler. I turned that book’s knowledge into UCMS.com, Duck9.com and CreditCard.org. It costs $3.25 used (including shipping) at Amazon.
-4- Thermometer of Debt.
Put up how much you owe on your fridge. This helps minimize the momentum effect of debt (see #2). It also gets you family on-board where your debt is front-and-center.
My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
-5- Written Complaints.
We write in our credit complaints versus calling or emailing them in. Writing preserves our rights. Remember, FCBA stands for “Fair Credit Billing Act”, not the ‘Fair Credit Bitching Act’.
Extra credit is where we cc our written complaints to CreditCard.org or email the letter to problems@CreditCard.org
-6- Battle Urban Credit Myths.
Get your credit report. No, it does not hurt to check your credit. There are three types of inquiries. Only one hurts.
The three types of inquiries are credit, advertiser and consumer. Only credit inquiries ding your FICO.
Another urban myth is free credit reports are available at AnnualCreditReport.com and NOT at freeCreditReport.con
-7- Fake a Loan.
Pay back a “fake” loan on a car you already own. How?! You borrow $1500 on a car you’ve paid off already. Eighteen $95 payments will raise your credit at a pretty low cost and raise your FICO 40+ points if you currrently have no car loan.
-8- Never Trust a Debt Collector.
Pay the original company you owe with a check that says ‘paid off as per account #___”. Pay the debt collector at your own risk because the credit bureaus get confused as to whether your debt obligation was met. The solution is to pay the original note holder with a paper check that serves as clear contract and paper trail.
-9- Underconsume or Be J.O.B. (Just Over Broke)
The best way to keep a high FICO after losing your job is maintaining a capital reserve.
Gordon Gecko in Wall Street said, “If you don’t keep cash, you can’t piss in the tall weeds with the big dogs”.
I underconsume even though I own 100% of Duck9 by shopping only at outlet malls. Below, I am garbed head-to-toe in the best Perry Ellis outlet mall in Napa has to offer.
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Larry models outlet mall clothes |
Good luck out there and text me during my office hours: 11:11am/pm give or take 15 minutes. This article is at http://tinyurl.com/FICOjob so tweet it @larrychiang! I am also on Facebook in the Austin TX network… why Texas?! It is because I started ‘Austin Secret Society of Entrepreneurs’ (#asse9). If you see a typo or grammatical error, email me! larry@larrychiang.com
Larry Chiang is the founder of Duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He is a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School“. For fun, he crashes parties he hosts, eats at Fraiche Yogurt in Palo Alto and plays basketball on college campuses.
How To Read People: The Character Compass Method
Larry Chiang is an instructive humorist. If you liked “10 Things They Don’t Teach You at Business School “, “Raise Your FICO While You’re An MBA Student“, “How to Work a Cocktail Party“,
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Will’s movie releases Dec 19 |
“Increase Your FICO After You Lose Your Job” and “Working a Twitter Party, Take 2“, his newest submission is something they’d NEVER teach at b-school: “How To Read People –the Character Compass Method” Before he’s done, you’ll outflank Organizational Behavior profs by reading people as easy as a 12 year-old Googles Tom Brady’s QB stats.
By Larry Chiang
File this under “What They’ll NEVER Teach at B-School”. This is my secret lesson in “Character Compassing”. It goes beyond reading people and definitely is not taught in business school.
Will Smith’s has a new movie coming out called “Seven Pounds” where he grants gifts. His naughty-and-nice list is whittled by character compassing gift recipients.
In the trailer for “Seven Pounds”
Will Smith says about Woody Harrelson, “I need to know if he is worthy of this gift.”
The concept of character compassing is intrusive: you are effectively crystal balling a person’s character. In business, we need an edge to know what a person will do when the chips are down, how they handle windfall or how they will deal with temporary misfortune.
My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
Mark McCormack mentors how to read people in my favorite book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School”. He talks about some oldie but goodie strategies of dining out, taking trips and watching golf ettiquete in getting to know people. While some methods may be time intensive, getting a good read on a person or ‘character compass’ can be extremely valuable.
I get creepy great reads into the bearing of people’s character compass… here is how I do it.
-1- Five Ego Warning Signals.
Egos fall and rise.
I get the setting and orientation of their character compass by reading into the five warning signals than an ego is in flux.
(A) Geographic stability. People who just move to a new city have a new-start attitude.
(B) Change in Romantic Friend(s). Gain two girlfriends, lose a 1st wife and their work productivity plummets.
(C) Family changes. Add a parent, lose a parent and your compass shifts. Lose a dad that was a mentor-hero-stalwart and his soul’s energy will fill you with white light.
(D) Change in possessions. Don’t be the cliche celebrity with your new Bentley… sandbag your celebrity because it is genius to keep a hoopT (aka junker).
(E) Change in job. Yes, selling Powerset to Microsoft is considered a new job. Keep it real as the PowerSet Founder & CEO by complaining, “Omg, Tweetsville costs $2.99?!”
As a rule of thumb, when two or more warning signals are in flux, people overextrapolate their fortune (and misfourtune).
-2- Last Six Books.
Read what they read and you’ll know what they know. The last two books might come up in conversation but books #3 – 6 you will require some digging. I also like to ask what their fave book is, but when I’m down in LA, I replace the word ‘book’ with ‘movie’ when I character compass
-3- Feng Shui My Cubicle.
Similar to when peeps pimp their ride (aka accessorize the car they love), I wanna see how you feng shui’d your cubicle. Based on how you ‘decorate’ your workspace enviroment, I can see how you interact with the business world. On good days, I can peg your salary give or take 200 bucks.
-4- Give Them Power.
Absolute power corrupts absolutely, but a li’l dab of power shows you who they really are.
In this original manuver, I feign a weakness and see what they do with it. For example, I say, “I’m thinking about starting a company that helps people with their credit scores.” Truth: Duck9 has kicked ass for four years.
Faking weakness lowers the barrier to revealing their character compass.
-5- Google Me Baby.
Will Smith Googles. I use registrars office data in confirmng academic credentials. Third party data confirmation (TPDC) could’ve prevented the mortgage meltdown (by checking salary versus IRS filings), but you can use Facebook, linkedIn and FriendFeed to augment the Googling.
-6- Area Code What?!
We all have a friend with a weird area code. Old area codes are like security blankets that keep people rooted to family in Minnesota. Area code 651 HBS girl is a stark contrast to Mr Five-Area-Codes-in-Five-Years.
Cell phone numbers have an age revealed in the numbers middle three digits. I like well seasoned ones. Because I do cell phone number underwriting at work, my character compass is over-the-top accurate with a cell number in hand. Its so important to me that I bought 415 720 8500 from Michael Puhala in 1999.
-7- Email Address Fetish.
Email address selection is similar to cell phone underwriting where email addresses convey age, purpose, anonymity, loyalty and transparency. What impressions do you get from seeing these email addresses
Larry@larrychiang.com
Lorenzo@t-mail.com
Chiang99@duck9.com
Lawrence.Chiang@gsb.stanford.edu
Larrrrrrrrreee@aol.com
Larry_Chiang@yahoo.com
Lawence.chiang@msn.com
Larry@duck9.com
LChiang@ucms.com
tall_asian_guy@yahoo.com
Yes, lorenzo and tall_asian_guy are my instant messaging handles for when I’m feeling romantic on the internet. Lawrence.Chiang@gsb.stanford.edu is a wet dream cuz I’m going to law school.
-8- Sound Bitten Analysis.
I listen like a really advanced lie detector.
Lie detectors detect voice stress. I look for voice comfort. When I hear ease-of-delivery, I know that what I’m hearing is ‘material’ versus newly constructed thought. This material is usually conjured up to form a mask to shield their souls intention and throw off my character compass.
My mentor, Mark McCormack, reads people’s masks in, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
-9- The Man, the Myth and the Mask.
Most people want to unmask a person and “get to their core”. I character compass more accurately because I want to know which mask they picked and why.
Actors know this. Tom Selleck, said “Acting mimicks life where I explore deeper character meaning in the mask that they pick”.
-10- Talent Sniffer.
Having a nose for talent is something that Mark McCormack was genius at. You HAVE to digest his book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School”, and get the nuggets of how he character compasses people’s talent.
My best summary of the mercurial skill of talent identification is I look for grace and competance under pressure. During hardship, some people focus and others fold. Talent is most difficult to see when there is no pressure. Talent is near impossible to identify at a party because its fluffy, fun and fake.
-12- Tag Team Character Compassing
Character compassing is also done in a group setting. Doing coffee or one-on-one interviews, your exchange is insulated and your interrogation is confined. Tag teaming is very common in social settings and parties.
-13- How Do They Self Soothe
How people self soothe is an insightful way to character compass a new friend. Volatility and uncertainty are addressed in vastly unique ways. I examine how people self-soothe.
Some people read.
Some people eat a lot of Ben and Jerry’s.
Other people escape into a movie.
Dating is silly because it’s all one smooth vacation of an experience. Dating ends with the master of all vacations: the Honeymoon. I wanna see you in hardship because no one truly self-soothes on a Hawaiian beach.
-14- Taking Credit Where Credit is Due
Will Smith is an IRS agent with access to sensitive data in Seven Pounds. My world swirls around credit data, so I imagine what derrogatories would be on their report after I talk with them. Dings (aka charge-offs, defaults or 9’s) on their credit report could be…
Exhibit One) Parking ticket from Beverly Hills CA*
Exhibit Two) College utility bill default
Exhibit Three) Car loan cosign default
Exhibit Four) Three 60 day lates from one cliche vacation to Europe after they got laid off.
Exhibit Five) Department store orphan debt of $30 sent to an old address*.
* $30 collection items always magically balloon to $110. People always pay these in full right before they buy a house.
The type of credit default show people’s character compass.
Go see the movie “Seven Pounds” and comment below how well Will Smith’s character compasses.
Good luck out there and text me during my office hours: 11:11am/pm give or take 15 minutes. This article is at http://tinyurl.com/12-18-08 so tweet it!!! I am also on Facebook in the Austin TX network… why Texas?! It is because I started ‘Austin Secret Society of Entrepreneurs’ (#asse9). If you see a typo or grammatical error, email me! larry@larrychiang.com
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Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Larry Chiang is the founder of Duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He is a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School“. For fun, writes in a journal, cooks on a hot plate and plays basketball on college campuses across
Christmas Credit Tips for College Students
Larry Chiang gets mentored from the best. If you liked “9 Things They Don’t Teach You at Stanford Business School “, “Raise Your FICO While You’re An MBA Student“, and “Increase Your FICO After You Lose Your Job” you’ll like his newest submission: “Christmas Credit Tips for College Students”.
By Larry Chiang
The holidays are for pilgrimages back home and seeing high school friends. I didn’t go to high school with you but I am about to be your BFF. I am going to give YOU the gift of street smarts. This is definitely stuff they don’t teach you in business school.
LESSON: THE inside look into how to really build credit. I built a secret society focused on inflating, hacking and manipulating your FICO score. Don’t know what a FICO score or don’t think it’s important?! Then stop reading now –
FICO eclipses your SAT score’s importance by leaps because it controls and dictates the largest expense in your life: INTEREST. There is a right side and a wrong side to the interest rate equation. Suckers pay interest and stay poor. Don’t wanna be the Mayor of Lollipop-ville, read on.
Add Information to Your Credit Transcript
Imagine if you could go back in time and add A’s to your high school transcript. Believe it — Your credit report is alterable.
Similar to how your credit reports from Trans Union, Equifax and Experian are like your running college transcript, you can add a bunch of A’s for yourself. How?! Charge and pay-off mini amounts EVERY MONTH. The foundation to the secret society that graduates in the 90th percentile in credit is 24 on-time payments in a row.
Mentor a Buddy.
What is the difference between zero paid on time and $20 paid on-time?! A ‘1′ versus an”x”. 1s mean you paid on time. x’s mean no transaction, no payment required. X’s don’t help your credit.
24 1’s is a FICO over 750. Pass this knowledge forward. Read it. Do it. Teach it.
Your own knowledge grows when you mentor a buddy.
Paper, Stamps and Antiquated Laws.
Credit is a remnant, old-world relic that dictates how much interest you will pay. Navigate and tip the credit rules in your favor with paper and stamps. Credit complaints carry no weight over email and are even less effective over the phone. Write to resolve a credit dispute.
Is the U.S. of A., FCBA rules. Writing preserves our rights. Remember, FCBA stands for “Fair Credit Billing Act”, not the ‘Fair Credit Bitching Act’. Post your credit complaint to CreditCard.org will add weight to your soapbox.
Credit Identify this Holiday Season.
Get organized.
- One manilla folder. List out every account you have and keep a copy of your credit report.
- One Gmail Folder. Same.
Publicize an Urban Myth on Your Facebook Status.
Greenland is ice and Iceland is green. The two largest credit myths:
(1) FreeCreditReport.com is not free. Its free at AnnualCreditReport.com
(2) No, it does not hurt to check your credit. There are three types of inquiries: credit, consumer and advertiser. Only credit inquiries hurts.
Set Reminder Messages in Your Google Calendar for 2009
Login to your account every 11th and 21st and pay your credit card’s mini amounts. Better yet, turn your credit card into a debit card and login every week to pay it off in full. Use Google or Outlook calendar to remind yourself the 11th AND 21st of every month.
Login to Your Campus Power, Water or Cable Bill(s)
Statistically, students get 2’s and 3s on their credit report when they’re on Christmas break or study abroad. 2’s are 30 days late and 3’s are 60 day late derrogatories on your credit report. We want 24 1s (on time payments) in a row.
EXTRA CREDIT: Run your credit report.
AnnualCreditReport.com. Better yet, mail in this form.
Not having your own credit report is like going off to college never having seen your high school transcript.
EXTRA CREDIT: Dispute something minor AND incorrect on your credit report (IN WRITING)
Duck 9s on Your Credit
Avoid 9s on your credit report. The banks are out to hurt college duckies– and that’s where Duck9 comes in. Duck9 can help you graduate with a FICO over 750.
Plan to Live Rent Free in 2011.
Live rent free when you get over 750 in FICO. Low mortgage rates, ease of qualification and a PITI under $1100 are keys to living rent free. How?! With your PITI under $1100, get two roomates paying $600 for your 3 BR/2Bath residence. PITI is principal, interest, taxes insurance.
Cheat on Your Bank
Don’t be one of those people that has checking, savings and credit card all at one bank. Save your monagamy for your dating relationship(s).
Good luck out there and text me during my office hours: 11:11am/pm give or take 15 minutes — 650-283-8008. This article is at http://tinyurl.com/12-22-08 so post it on Facebook!!! I am also on Facebook in the Austin TX network… why Texas?! It is because I started ‘Austin Secret Society of Entrepreneurs’ (#asse9). If you see a typo or grammatical error, email me! larry@larrychiang.com
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Larry’s book release 09-09-09 and BIO: http://tinyurl.com/AmazonBio |
Larry Chiang is the founder of Duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He is a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School“. For fun, writes in a journal, cooks on a hot plate and plays basketball on college campuses across America.
Mark Cuban’s ‘Two Step’ Path to a Street Smart MBA
Larry Chiang gets access and mentorship from great business minds. If you liked “10 Things They Don’t Teach You at Business School “, and “How to Work a Cocktail Party“, you’ll like his newest submission: “Mark Cuban’s ‘Two Step’ Path to a Street Smart MBA”.
| Mark Cuban at TC50 (Photo credit Brian Solis) |
By Larry Chiang
I’m the kind of guy who likes to summarize everything into a CliffsNotes-like format. I’m currently working on a book called “What They Don’t Teach You At Stanford Business School” that reduces an MBA to just fourteen bullet pointed chapters.
This is why I am so impressed by the maverick billionaire and startup founder Mark Cuban, who did me one better recently by whittling down the portfolio of skills required to be a successful entrepreneur to just two little things.
I met-up with Mark in early September at Mike Arrington’s TechCrunch50 and in October for a Cubs playoff game. Lecturing me over nearly eight hours as we shuttled from one after-party to another (and another), the founder of MircoSolutions, Broadcast.com, and 2929 Entertainment, explained how he used two primary disciplines-embrace failure & identify pain- to guide his companies through some really tough times, and even to help turn around an ailing basketball franchise — the Dallas Mavericks.
Based on our nights of banter, my guess is that Mark would say these skills apply to founders during this havoc-ridden market. Mark is no college FICO credit specialist, but I’m inclined to give his method [the 'Cuban Two Step'] a try: employing it has also helped Mark catapult himself past fellow-Texan business mogul Ross Perot on Forbes’s list of wealthiest Americans. (Ross was the previous Dallas Mavericks owner.)
So here is the Cuban ‘Two-Step’ to a Street Smart MBA. Like I said, it took me eighteen hours to extract, two months to digest and ten hours to write. You get in under eight minutes.
My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
Mark Cuban’s Two-Step to the Street Smart MBA
(1) Embrace failure (It’s temporary!)
(2) Identify pain. Then solve it.
(1) Embrace failure (It’s temporary!)
Silicon Valley loves a founder who can wrestle success from failure. Fortunes always ebb and flow. Mark has shown he can consistently make money from bad fortune.
A lighthearted example of this was when Mark was fined by the NBA after his comment that some NBA referees are not even qualified to manage a ‘Dairy Queen’ ice cream store. After paying the fine, Cuban served soft-serve cones and got major ESPN coverage.
A heavy example Cuban cited was at MicroSolutions. “Renee Hardy stealing $80K of accounts payable [account],” Mark recollected. He later found out she was whiting out checks and adding her name to siphon off money. Mark dug his heels and committed himself to making payroll. “I worked my [tail] off to close sales and begged vendors to let me be late in payments.” Mark says that when failure stares you in the face and puts you in a hole, “Dig in, and dig yourself out.”
(2) Identify a Market Pain
Then alleviate it. Mark only founds or invests in companies that resolve “a market pain.”
Before the Internet was our standard operating platform, businesses had a hard time integrating their departmental information systems with one another. MicroSolutions was an early enterprise “hack” for intra-department communication. It used CompuServe as the backbone and LotusNotes as a platform to enable managing tasks like word processing, spreadsheets and database management between offices of a single company.
Mark’s current startup, 2929 Entertainment, solves a big Hollywood studio pain: declining revenues due to a costly distribution channel choked by theater owners. Most independent films can’t afford distribution at all anymore.
“The independent film industry has been dying an ever slow death, I’m solving it,” Mark said. Cuban recognized the ever shortening cycle between film relaase and DVD release. He innovated by having same day theatrical and DVD release, and in Cuban’s words, “focused us on how to blow DVDs out the door”.
I’ll be in my Palo Alto cubicle embracing failure and identifying market pain so text me 650-283-8008
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Larry wants to be a billionaire |
during my office hours: 11:11am OR pm give or take 15 minutes. I am also on Facebook in the Austin TX network… why Texas?! It is because I started ‘Austin Secret Society of Entrepreneurs’ (#asse9). If you see a typo or grammatical error, email me! larry@larrychiang.com
Larry Chiang is the founder of Duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He is a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School“. For fun, he studies massage therapy, does Yoga and plays basketball on college campuses.
Ten Things I Learned About Making Money (at Las Vegas Conference)
Larry Chiang gets access to the best business conferences. If you liked “10 Things They Don’t Teach You at Business School “, “How to Work a Cocktail Party” and “Mark Cuban’s ‘Two Step’ Path to a Street Smart MBA”, you’ll like his newest submission.
By Larry Chiang
Las Vegas, Nevada — January 14th –I love commission.
There is no clearer measurement and reward than the payment of a “sales commission”. Every cent I have earned is on the sale of SOMETHING.
There’s an industry of people called affiliates that make commissions when they sell for websites. This past week in Las Vegas, I crashed their conference called, “Affiliate Summit” (ASW09). Here are 10 things I learned that cost me a grand or three but will only cost you nine minutes;
-1- Hide Your Advantage.
I have this theory that 10 guys at Affiliate Summit make what the rest of the 3200 conference attendees make. You’d never know it by asking them cuz they sandbag their business method / sales / profits / business model / how they started.
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My mentor, Mark McCormack, who wrote the book, “What They Don’t Teach You At Harvard Business School“. |
Sandbagging is when you understate and aww-shucks your way past a compliment. Alpha affiliates sandbag when you ask them how they run programs.
-2- Parties Have an ROI Too
Parties at ASW09 don’t promote, they reward. Industry parties in developing industries promote and HOPE for traction. At Affiliate Summit, parties are to reward their best affiliates (sometimes with topless women). If a party is worth throwing, it is worth throwing for money.
-3- Sex Sells.
The biggest short-cut to getting product moved is incorporating sex into an offer.
Sprinkle sex into a legit offer and boom, you’ve gotta hit on your hands.
I am not kidding about the CEO… He’s hecka hot.
-4- Pre-Rolls to Promote.
At Affiliate Summit, it’s all about promotion. Pre-rolls are when a person makes a long winded statement BEFORE they ask their question during speaker Q&A.
For example, after an @JayBerkowitz session, I’d say, “hi, I’m Larry Chiang of BusinessWeek fame. Yeah, SHUCKS, I also started the largest company that sells credit cards to college students, UCMS. My twitter name is @LarryChiang. ANYWAY, I had a question about my current project duck9… how do you manage podcast question archiving using ‘T7′?
Just Kidding, I really said, “Hi Jay nice job! what the eff is T7?!”
I took this as I was getting the dance floor going. Yes, the three girls behind the glass were topless and getting painted at CX Digital’s Swaree at the Palms. No, I didn’t hook up (there).
-5- Access is Multi-Layered.
Every event at ASW09 was layered and measured. Badges were Silver to Platinum. Even after you get a wristband, there were layers and layers of crowd control barriers and bouncers. Read and “character compass” the gatekeepers to whittle away layers.
-6- Half the Attendees Didn’t Read “How to Work a Conference”
I read this great great post on “How to Work a Conference“. It listed out 21 lucky tips. This really good looking guy wrote it. Holy Ducky!, did I just say something gay?!
Read it because 85% of the time it works all the time.
-7- What the Eff is a Blogger?!
“Press is nice but hey I’m making money so I definitely don’t need to kiss blogger ass” was the predominant attitude at Affiliate Summit. I saw an older fellow sporting his bright orange CES press badge from the weekend before. Here at ASW, we just worry about one thing… real money and maybe mainstream press, but definitely not a blogger with a cute pink press ribbon. To her credit, Julie Vazquez made the best of the blogger room.
-8-Silicon Valley Come Lately.
The poster child for Silicon Valley is Facebook’s CEO and Founder, Mark Zuckerberg. This new kid on the block did something smart… it hired an ex pay day lender and Affiliate Summit veteran, Sarah Smith, to lead the affiliate push. Previous to fBook, Smith was at Swish Marketing, a top three payday lender located in Palo Alto, California.
You might have two Crunchies (three if you count last year) but you stubbed you toe in clear examples of how NOT to sell a credit card.
Until I can buy lead number one for UCMS or Duck9, Facebook will serve only as a social networking purpose.
-9- Swinging Smart For Singles.
If you buy leads for $4 and sell them for $7, you have got a REAL business. Swinging for the massive homerun (Twitter) where you fundraise $4,000,000 in VC (venture capital) and get valued for $15B is tough.
Gary Vanerchuck, in his keynote, recommends swinging for a homer. Do what Gary does and not what he says. TRANSLATION: Gary motivates YOU to swing for the fences, but he himself hits solid single after solid single.
I’ve been doing research and I found out that 100% of companies worth $1B, all used to be worth $10mm.
-10- Set Aside Your Need to Make Short Term $.
When you’re in a room full of people that love money, they behave cliche-ly. How?! They all chase money in all of its easiest forms.
I got to siddle up and get mentored by a couple of the richest guys in the conference… they all set aside their need for short term money and built something great.
BONUS #11: Wars Aren’t Won From Ivory Towers
Did you know Chruchill’s war room was the size of a shoebox?! He was the alpha male in London when the Axis Forces were running multiple bombing missions. Ivory tower theorists abound in my city by the bay (SF).
Wars are won on the front lines of business and in the gritty hand-to-hand combat of a conference. They’re won over one party at a time - - one coffee at a time. For example, the mighty and powerful Facebook produced a sub $300 event in a college-like fashion by hosting office hours at an effen Starbucks in the hinterlands of Rio’s conference center. Welcome to the trenches Mark Zuckerberg… the water’s warm.
BONUS #12: Bingo is Played By the Cool Kids.
Gary Vanerchuck (@garyVee) hosted bingo during his keynote. I love Bingo too. Gary kicks keynote butt, but I bore so I used Bingo as a crutch at iMedia’s Finance Marketing Conference.
Twitter coverage at Affiliate Summit West 2009 was under ‘#asw09‘. Don’t know what Twitter or a hashtag is?! Read my Twitter article(s) here, here and here.
I’ll be in my Palo Alto cubicle earning my next commission check, so text me 650-283-8008.
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My office hours: 11:11am OR and 11:11 pm give or take 15 minutes. I am also on Facebook in the Austin TX network… why Texas?! It is because I started ‘Austin Secret Society of Entrepreneurs’ (#asse9). If you see a typo or grammatical error, email me! larry@larrychiang.com
Larry Chiang is the founder of Duck9, which educates college students on how to establish and maintain a FICO score over 750. He has testified before Congress and World Bank on credit.
He is a frequent contributor to Business Week’s blog on “What They Don’t Teach You at Business School“. For fun, he plays basketball on college campuses and eats on campus by crashing dorm cafeterias and sorority houses.
